PDF NEW [Out of the Shadows Reimagining Gay Men's Lives]

Free read ´ PDF, eBook or Kindle ePUB free ð Walt Odets

review Ï Out of the Shadows Reimagining Gay Men's Lives 105 Free read ´ PDF, eBook or Kindle ePUB free ð Walt Odets characters Out of the Shadows Reimagining Gay Men's Lives W uncompromising future both for the men who endured the upheaval of those years and for the younger men who have come of age since then at a time when an HIV epidemic is still ravaging the gay community especially among the most marginalizedThrough moving stories of friends and patients and his own Odets considers how experiences early in life launch men on trajectories aimed at futures that are not authentically theirs He writes to help reconstruct how we think about gay life by considering everything from the misleading idea of “the homosexual” to the diversity and richness of gay relationships to the historical role of stigma and shame and the significance of youth and of aging Crawling. I was terribly moved by this book and while I commend Odets for his urgent and respectful voice guiding readers through this tough look on shame isolation trauma and recovery it s the stories one after the other of the ueer men he interviewed and counseled that make this a must read No surprise then that the final chapter is Odet s personal story and his own relationships It s a beautiful arcOdets gives the men in this book wide berth to tell their stories all heroic ones he asserts The stories educate readers about how men have survived the trauma of the AIDS epidemic and its aftermath as well as the short circuited self realization and maturation brought on by the closetI was reminded while reading of my favourite book A Little Life and why I m so moved by the horrific yet heroic story of Jude St Francis JStF will always be in my heart But ultimately I m simply in awe of the work of therapists and psychologists Odets knows the awesome task of having to bear witness to human striving amid terrible suffering stigmatization marginalization and fear But he also knows how to honor those storiesTo say I felt seen reading this book is only a small wonder in light of this book s scope The human lives captured within these pages lives not characters will stay with me for a long time And I m left wondering that eternal Mary Oliver invocation What am I as man as ueer as husband as teacher as father going to do with my one wild and precious life The PH Scale years and for the Be an Anthropologist younger men who have come of age since then at a time when an HIV epidemic is still ravaging the gay community especially among the most marginalizedThrough moving stories of friends and patients and his own Odets considers how experiences early in life launch men on trajectories aimed at futures that are not authentically theirs He writes to help reconstruct how we think about gay life by considering everything from the misleading idea of “the homosexual” to the diversity and richness of gay relationships to the historical role of stigma and shame and the significance of Be an Anthropologist youth and of aging Crawling. I was terribly moved by this book and while I commend Odets for his urgent and respectful voice guiding readers through this tough look on shame isolation trauma and recovery it s the stories one after the other of the ueer men he interviewed and counseled that make this a must read No surprise then that the final chapter is Odet s personal story and his own relationships It s a beautiful arcOdets gives the men in this book wide berth to tell their stories all heroic ones he asserts The stories educate readers about how men have survived the trauma of the AIDS epidemic and its aftermath as well as the short circuited self realization and maturation brought on by the closetI was reminded while reading of my favourite book A Little Life and why I m so moved by the horrific The PH Scale yet heroic story of Jude St Francis JStF will always be in my heart But ultimately I m simply in awe of the work of therapists and psychologists Odets knows the awesome task of having to bear witness to human striving amid terrible suffering stigmatization marginalization and fear But he also knows how to honor those storiesTo say I felt seen reading this book is only a small wonder in light of this book s scope The human lives captured within these pages lives not characters will stay with me for a long time And I m left wondering that eternal Mary Oliver invocation What am I as man as ueer as husband as teacher as father going to do with my one wild and precious life

characters Out of the Shadows Reimagining Gay Men's LivesOut of the Shadows Reimagining Gay Men's Lives

review Ï Out of the Shadows Reimagining Gay Men's Lives 105 Free read ´ PDF, eBook or Kindle ePUB free ð Walt Odets characters Out of the Shadows Reimagining Gay Men's Lives Out from under the trauma of destructive early life experience and the two epidemics and into a century of shifting social values provides an opportunity to explore possibilities rather than live with limitations imposed by others Though it is drawn from decades of private practice activism and life in the gay community Odets’s work achieves remarkable universality At its core Out of the Shadows is driven by his belief that it is time that we act based on who we are and not who others are or who they would want us to be We particularly the young must construct our own paths through life Out of the Shadows is a necessary impassioned argument for how and why we must all take hold of our future. Full disclosure I received this book for free from Goodreads So I m not sure what I expected this to be but I sure didn t expect it to be everything that it was It was such a well done piece of work the author deserves praise for what he s he s done here That said I m not uite certain how to relate my reading experience here I uite enjoyed the insight provided via the interplay of the author s lived realities as a compassionate psychologist his personal life as a gay man His read on recent history in the world of gay men I m calling recent Stonewall to the present the sometimes odd ways the cumulative fallout of it all manifests itself in so many myriad ways in the world of gay men in the United States is nothing if not eye opening I learned SO MUCH Perhaps it may help potential readers to be explicitly aware that the information in this book pertains to the US population Populations elsewhere may have overlap on some issues but in no way will the entirety of this book wholly relate to the gay male population of any other nation Although that is so interested parties should not be put off from reading this There is still so much available here that is universal but nothing that might not be understood by all readers I am simply saying that if one is seeking information on the lives of gay men elsewhere in the world this book might provide illumination only in the way that it examines a population individuals w histories of being considered as undesirable outsiders by the larger society in which they exist The psychological damage of living under such sustained threat strain is indeed universal A few tidbits of what I learned might be appropriate The grouping along age lines to better understand generational differences of this population in relating to one another was highly enlightening The way the generations relate to the AIDS crisis alone is enough to almost put the groups on their own islands Then there is the aspect of community that coalesced in a sad way dissipated both w the knowledge of the virus treatment possibilities w the almost invasive usurpation by social media apps Loneliness is epidemic Too many gay men raised in the US culture of hyper masculine posturing worship of physical objectification as superior to intimate connection have not the 1st clue how to go about acuiring the support they need to mature into healthy stable men Nor do they know how to deal w the trauma socially acuired shame that often than not remains internalized unrecognized w expert levels of denial which therefore does nothing but fester unabated in the subconscious Such a reaction is not uncommon in any marginalized person nor is it uncommon when it occurs in entire traumatized unsupported communities or populations In fact amongst younger gay men there is a sort of refusal to acknowledge vulnerability It manifests oddly as an almost full denial of AIDS as a real threat w the reuisite shunning of HIV persons rather than the support one might think a younger informed population should have developed In slightly older generations utter paranoia about condom usage can result in a very stressful hyper vigilance that eventually exhausts the individual psyche Then of course there is the older generation suffering from an unreal amount of PTSD from the grief terror of the time when the unknown was culling them w an invisible scythe the broader society either turned their backs or applauded While the above seems bleak it explains so much It clearly identifies the paths that brought that population each of it s sub groups to the place they are in now Knowing one s history can do so much to aid one s own understanding of one s own self Seeing the whole historical pathway of it could be empowering to individuals by enabling better identification of the reasons one may be reacting negatively to their place in modern times Hopefully such identification would facilitate becoming better adjusted to living in the world Additionally knowing that other people are out there dealing w the same traumas allows one to feel less alone to acknowledge that social connection is possible Validation of shared trauma could do wonders for the healing processes of some people in this community particularly those still unable to process so many years of grief extreme loss Fortunately this population like all populations is made up of individuals As such despite the 1 larger connection of identifying as gay there are multitudinous examples of living according to one s own terms owning one s own life despite all that may stacked against the group as a whole There is no one way to be who you are so to speak That both opens up all kinds of possibilities all kinds of modern uestions For instance toward the back of the book there is a very valid section that mentions the desire of the larger non hetero population to acuire all the blessings bestowed via societally accepted hetero normativity In other words marriage child rearing all the blessings of the state that are conferred upon this type of old institution While certainly an understandable notion is it really the be all end all of euality Obviously denial of rights benefits is not acceptable but are other loving supportive relationships any less deserving of respect Non traditional relationships have abounded over the course of human history but they are nearly always invalidated as valid worthy of respect by those respectable law abiding types of humans their institutions It seems just another way to create even class divisions in my personal opinion This book does not fully go into discussion on such a topic but merely raises the idea that in going forward fully contemplating why a collective path has been chosen possibly what hands one might be playing into can only allow for broader discussion of what inclusion acceptance really mean Working toward a desirable outcome for all not just those willing to conform is beneficial not to just certain individuals populations but to the whole of society For any out group conforming to broader norms to justify worthiness tends to not benefit the whole of their members Rather it may serve to further diminish ostracize those persons who don t fit into that mold of accepted so called normative conformity simply so that some members of the group might find some extra inches of acceptance When talking about this specific grouping of persons that is very particular kind of acceptance often socially conditional granted by the society institutions that only yesterday were content to let them die Big uestions for any group seeking to throw off so much history of injustice oppression worth the brief illuminating mention given here in Inclusion is tricky rope so it s worthwhile to consider such uestions A fuller understanding of any undertaking in never an ill thing to acuire Finally I just want to say that I saw a comment in a review that suggested the author thought sex was the answer to everything For the life of me I can not understand how that conclusion was arrived at by the commenter It was not my experience in these pages There were some patients w intimacy issues meaning the fall out after the excitement of a new relationship had worn off as it will eventually do Being men raised stateside emotional vocabulary availability was not 2nd nature by any means thus the source of the difficulties w maintaining a bond once the physicality had been dialed down It s understandable very human very much able to be improved upon by willing parties not spooked into paralysis by the emotional vulnerability of that learning curve All long term relationships undergo some degree of this phase in a relationship In those w members raised on a mythos euating feelings to weakness however this can be an especially difficult time Thus the help they sought by enlisting our psychologist author to assist them in navigating such terrain Outside of overcoming the estrangement felt by the members of such relationships I have no idea what the aforementioned commenter might have been alluding to maybe we read different books I ve a friend completing her psychology Masters I will pass this book on to her I nearly passed it on to my gay daughter as we had recently had a discussion about what is appropriate at gay pride parades given the fact that children are often present Being an older although hetero leaning person I had a longer partially directly experienced view of the history of repression that was being currently played out by such attire as bondage wear the like which I was able to relate It was a case of history being played out isn t everything another example of how knowing the past can help one to understand the point at which we are existing presently Also this is why the different generations must talk to each other I had no idea people were attempting to regulate how others celebrated Pride she didn t fully understand why such attire forms of suggestive public display were guaranteed to be present at Pride So we both learned things which is good for everyone I further elaborated that these were learning moments for parents to have healthy discussions w kids rather than continuing to practice the societally avoidant stance on such arbitrarily moral practices like sex the human psyche biology Age appropriateness is of course called for in such discussions but if one doesn t treat a thing as if it is abhorrent then developing brains will not place special attention on it thus avoid processing emotions associated w it s otherwise unexplained relationship to shame So many hang ups can be avoided by just being frank about life the variety of ways of living Of course that s just me Oh look at me digressing Point is I think the insights will do good by being absorbed by someone about to go out do therapy every day than my kid who will likely let this sit on her shelf for a couple years before getting around to it In fairness I ve sent her a small library worth of books No worries Once published I ll get her a copy I know she ll learn so very much she ll love it like I did In short I recommend it I m so pleased I won this The Advent of Christmas young must construct our own paths through life Out of the Shadows is a necessary impassioned argument for how and why we must all take hold of our future. Full disclosure I received this book for free from Goodreads So I m not sure what I expected this to be but I sure didn t expect it to be everything that it was It was such a well done piece of work the author deserves praise for what he s he s done here That said I m not uite certain how to relate my reading experience here I uite enjoyed the insight provided via the interplay of the author s lived realities as a compassionate psychologist his personal life as a gay man His read on recent history in the world of gay men I m calling recent Stonewall to the present the sometimes odd ways the cumulative fallout of it all manifests itself in so many myriad ways in the world of gay men in the United States is nothing if not eye opening I learned SO MUCH Perhaps it may help potential readers to be explicitly aware that the information in this book pertains to the US population Populations elsewhere may have overlap on some issues but in no way will the entirety of this book wholly relate to the gay male population of any other nation Although that is so interested parties should not be put off from reading this There is still so much available here that is universal but nothing that might not be understood by all readers I am simply saying that if one is seeking information on the lives of gay men elsewhere in the world this book might provide illumination only in the way that it examines a population individuals w histories of being considered as undesirable outsiders by the larger society in which they exist The psychological damage of living under such sustained threat strain is indeed universal A few tidbits of what I learned might be appropriate The grouping along age lines to better understand generational differences of this population in relating to one another was highly enlightening The way the generations relate to the AIDS crisis alone is enough to almost put the groups on their own islands Then there is the aspect of community that coalesced in a sad way dissipated both w the knowledge of the virus treatment possibilities w the almost invasive usurpation by social media apps Loneliness is epidemic Too many gay men raised in the US culture of hyper masculine posturing worship of physical objectification as superior to intimate connection have not the 1st clue how to go about acuiring the support they need to mature into healthy stable men Nor do they know how to deal w the trauma socially acuired shame that often than not remains internalized unrecognized w expert levels of denial which therefore does nothing but fester unabated in the subconscious Such a reaction is not uncommon in any marginalized person nor is it uncommon when it occurs in entire traumatized unsupported communities or populations In fact amongst We Need Sharks younger gay men there is a sort of refusal to acknowledge vulnerability It manifests oddly as an almost full denial of AIDS as a real threat w the reuisite shunning of HIV persons rather than the support one might think a We Need Sharks younger informed population should have developed In slightly older generations utter paranoia about condom usage can result in a very stressful hyper vigilance that eventually exhausts the individual psyche Then of course there is the older generation suffering from an unreal amount of PTSD from the grief terror of the time when the unknown was culling them w an invisible scythe the broader society either turned their backs or applauded While the above seems bleak it explains so much It clearly identifies the paths that brought that population each of it s sub groups to the place they are in now Knowing one s history can do so much to aid one s own understanding of one s own self Seeing the whole historical pathway of it could be empowering to individuals by enabling better identification of the reasons one may be reacting negatively to their place in modern times Hopefully such identification would facilitate becoming better adjusted to living in the world Additionally knowing that other people are out there dealing w the same traumas allows one to feel less alone to acknowledge that social connection is possible Validation of shared trauma could do wonders for the healing processes of some people in this community particularly those still unable to process so many Daias Festivos Nacionales years of grief extreme loss Fortunately this population like all populations is made up of individuals As such despite the 1 larger connection of identifying as gay there are multitudinous examples of living according to one s own terms owning one s own life despite all that may stacked against the group as a whole There is no one way to be who Hand in Hand you are so to speak That both opens up all kinds of possibilities all kinds of modern uestions For instance toward the back of the book there is a very valid section that mentions the desire of the larger non hetero population to acuire all the blessings bestowed via societally accepted hetero normativity In other words marriage child rearing all the blessings of the state that are conferred upon this type of old institution While certainly an understandable notion is it really the be all end all of euality Obviously denial of rights benefits is not acceptable but are other loving supportive relationships any less deserving of respect Non traditional relationships have abounded over the course of human history but they are nearly always invalidated as valid worthy of respect by those respectable law abiding types of humans their institutions It seems just another way to create even class divisions in my personal opinion This book does not fully go into discussion on such a topic but merely raises the idea that in going forward fully contemplating why a collective path has been chosen possibly what hands one might be playing into can only allow for broader discussion of what inclusion acceptance really mean Working toward a desirable outcome for all not just those willing to conform is beneficial not to just certain individuals populations but to the whole of society For any out group conforming to broader norms to justify worthiness tends to not benefit the whole of their members Rather it may serve to further diminish ostracize those persons who don t fit into that mold of accepted so called normative conformity simply so that some members of the group might find some extra inches of acceptance When talking about this specific grouping of persons that is very particular kind of acceptance often socially conditional granted by the society institutions that only Portraits Without Frames yesterday were content to let them die Big uestions for any group seeking to throw off so much history of injustice oppression worth the brief illuminating mention given here in Inclusion is tricky rope so it s worthwhile to consider such uestions A fuller understanding of any undertaking in never an ill thing to acuire Finally I just want to say that I saw a comment in a review that suggested the author thought sex was the answer to everything For the life of me I can not understand how that conclusion was arrived at by the commenter It was not my experience in these pages There were some patients w intimacy issues meaning the fall out after the excitement of a new relationship had worn off as it will eventually do Being men raised stateside emotional vocabulary availability was not 2nd nature by any means thus the source of the difficulties w maintaining a bond once the physicality had been dialed down It s understandable very human very much able to be improved upon by willing parties not spooked into paralysis by the emotional vulnerability of that learning curve All long term relationships undergo some degree of this phase in a relationship In those w members raised on a mythos euating feelings to weakness however this can be an especially difficult time Thus the help they sought by enlisting our psychologist author to assist them in navigating such terrain Outside of overcoming the estrangement felt by the members of such relationships I have no idea what the aforementioned commenter might have been alluding to maybe we read different books I ve a friend completing her psychology Masters I will pass this book on to her I nearly passed it on to my gay daughter as we had recently had a discussion about what is appropriate at gay pride parades given the fact that children are often present Being an older although hetero leaning person I had a longer partially directly experienced view of the history of repression that was being currently played out by such attire as bondage wear the like which I was able to relate It was a case of history being played out isn t everything another example of how knowing the past can help one to understand the point at which we are existing presently Also this is why the different generations must talk to each other I had no idea people were attempting to regulate how others celebrated Pride she didn t fully understand why such attire forms of suggestive public display were guaranteed to be present at Pride So we both learned things which is good for everyone I further elaborated that these were learning moments for parents to have healthy discussions w kids rather than continuing to practice the societally avoidant stance on such arbitrarily moral practices like sex the human psyche biology Age appropriateness is of course called for in such discussions but if one doesn t treat a thing as if it is abhorrent then developing brains will not place special attention on it thus avoid processing emotions associated w it s otherwise unexplained relationship to shame So many hang ups can be avoided by just being frank about life the variety of ways of living Of course that s just me Oh look at me digressing Point is I think the insights will do good by being absorbed by someone about to go out do therapy every day than my kid who will likely let this sit on her shelf for a couple Ambulances years before getting around to it In fairness I ve sent her a small library worth of books No worries Once published I ll get her a copy I know she ll learn so very much she ll love it like I did In short I recommend it I m so pleased I won this

Free read ´ PDF, eBook or Kindle ePUB free ð Walt Odets

review Ï Out of the Shadows Reimagining Gay Men's Lives 105 Free read ´ PDF, eBook or Kindle ePUB free ð Walt Odets characters Out of the Shadows Reimagining Gay Men's Lives A moving exploration of how gay men construct their identities fight to be themselves and live authenticallyIt goes without saying that even today it’s not easy to be gay in America While young gay men often come out readily even those from the most progressive of backgrounds still struggle with the legacy of early life stigma and a deficit of self acceptance which can fuel doubt regret and at worst self loathing And this is to say nothing of the ongoing trauma wrought by AIDS which is all too often relegated to history Drawing on his work as a clinical psychologist during and in the aftermath of the epidemic Walt Odets reflects on what it means to survive and figure out a way to live in a ne. An essential exploration of the possibilities for gay self love in the wake of lifelong and ongoing personal and community trauma by a gay psychotherapist who has treated hundreds of gay men attempting to build authentic lives in the face of immense and ethically inexcusable suffering This brave beautiful book is a guidemap or as Odets calls it a songbook for interrogating the coping mechanisms that can imperil healing and a authentic life Empathetic and wise I cried so much Including on a plane For this gay man it was life changing


10 thoughts on “PDF NEW [Out of the Shadows Reimagining Gay Men's Lives]

  1. says: PDF NEW [Out of the Shadows Reimagining Gay Men's Lives] Free read ´ PDF, eBook or Kindle ePUB free ð Walt Odets Walt Odets ð 5 review

    Free read ´ PDF, eBook or Kindle ePUB free ð Walt Odets Walt Odets ð 5 review characters Out of the Shadows Reimagining Gay Men's Lives Pearl Ruled p59The first chapter Are Gay Men Homosexuals? wants to delve deep into an old old argument about identity and self definition that uite frankly is beyond my capabilities just now My dear Young Gentleman Caller recently departed this sandy spot on Earth asked me to read it so I didthe first chapterand I'm just not down for a discussion of what makes me like all the other UILTBAG people in the world Am I in

  2. says: PDF NEW [Out of the Shadows Reimagining Gay Men's Lives] Walt Odets ð 5 review

    PDF NEW [Out of the Shadows Reimagining Gay Men's Lives] An essential exploration of the possibilities for gay self love in the wake of lifelong and ongoing personal and community t

  3. says: PDF NEW [Out of the Shadows Reimagining Gay Men's Lives]

    characters Out of the Shadows Reimagining Gay Men's Lives Walt Odets ð 5 review Free read ´ PDF, eBook or Kindle ePUB free ð Walt Odets If you are a gay man or know someone who is a gay man listen up Walt Odets has been a San Francisco psychotherapist for over 40 years His book Out of the Shadows Reimagining Gay Men's Lives is a call to embrace the life we were meant to live no matter what age we are when we read this book Odets weaves the understanding

  4. says: characters Out of the Shadows Reimagining Gay Men's Lives PDF NEW [Out of the Shadows Reimagining Gay Men's Lives] Free read ´ PDF, eBook or Kindle ePUB free ð Walt Odets

    characters Out of the Shadows Reimagining Gay Men's Lives Free read ´ PDF, eBook or Kindle ePUB free ð Walt Odets Walt Odets ð 5 review Note Odets’s book is focused on gay males so I will use the word gay rather than the inclusive LGBTI cannot do this book justice with this review In fact I cannot do it justice with a single reading As I read I was aware that Odets was writing about something that would take a lifetime to undo and to reimagine—my own life as wel

  5. says: PDF NEW [Out of the Shadows Reimagining Gay Men's Lives] Walt Odets ð 5 review Free read ´ PDF, eBook or Kindle ePUB free ð Walt Odets

    characters Out of the Shadows Reimagining Gay Men's Lives PDF NEW [Out of the Shadows Reimagining Gay Men's Lives] I was terribly moved by this book and while I commend Odets for his urgent and respectful voice guiding readers through this

  6. says: PDF NEW [Out of the Shadows Reimagining Gay Men's Lives]

    PDF NEW [Out of the Shadows Reimagining Gay Men's Lives] Free read ´ PDF, eBook or Kindle ePUB free ð Walt Odets Every page of this book to me go to therapy please 😌🤗

  7. says: PDF NEW [Out of the Shadows Reimagining Gay Men's Lives]

    PDF NEW [Out of the Shadows Reimagining Gay Men's Lives] Walt Odets has done a phenomenal job of describing the life of a gay man in America This should be reuired reading for all gay bi ueer gender fluid trans etc individuals as well as any allies friends or curious souls Odets is a clinical psychologist and thus presents various aspects of the gay existence via psychological case studies Each account is compelling and for me hauntingly familiar as I suspect it would be for

  8. says: characters Out of the Shadows Reimagining Gay Men's Lives Walt Odets ð 5 review Free read ´ PDF, eBook or Kindle ePUB free ð Walt Odets

    PDF NEW [Out of the Shadows Reimagining Gay Men's Lives] It is rare that I read a book that resonates so closely with my experiences This book stirred up a lot of emotional baggage for me but in a good way This book is brave honest and insightful Highly recommended especially for gay men seeking encouragement to embrace a life of self acceptance and authenticity I'm grateful to Walt Odets for this gift

  9. says: Free read ´ PDF, eBook or Kindle ePUB free ð Walt Odets Walt Odets ð 5 review characters Out of the Shadows Reimagining Gay Men's Lives

    PDF NEW [Out of the Shadows Reimagining Gay Men's Lives] Full disclosure I received this book for free from Goodreads So I'm not sure what I expected this to be but I sure didn't

  10. says: PDF NEW [Out of the Shadows Reimagining Gay Men's Lives]

    PDF NEW [Out of the Shadows Reimagining Gay Men's Lives] Walt Odets ð 5 review It took me a long time to finish reading this book because I recognized myself on every page and that was painful For anyone gay or straight or otherwise wanting to delver deeply into what it means and what it's meant to be gay and not just homosexual I couldn't recommend this book

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  • Hardcover
  • 368
  • Out of the Shadows Reimagining Gay Men's Lives
  • Walt Odets
  • English
  • 04 August 2020
  • 9780374285852